Bomb

I had a big project I wanted to be finished by tomorrow, but it's turning out to be an epic failure.

Todd is in the process of starting his own business.  It's slow going and I felt like he needed a boost and what better way to feel boosted than to walk into your very own office!  Right?  You know, I had major visions of a grand unveiling, like when Candice Olson welcomes a client into their home after she has spent just a day or two working on a particular room.  It always looks soooooo incredible and complete down to the most minute detail.

Tomorrow, when Todd walks into his office I am going to have to say things like, (imagine me spreading my arms out in a gesture similar to the girls on the Price is Right) "Now, this is where all of your diplomas and certificates will hang, but they are still two weeks out from the framer."  "Here is where your blinds will be, but I got them one inch too small and ran out of time to return them to Lowe's."  Then of course there is, "I have a custom sign that has been made to match your totally amazing business cards, but the standoffs for installation are somewhere in Connecticut right now."

All of the painting was done yesterday.  A beautiful gray.  Not a brown gray, or a purply gray, a man's gray.  It looks perfect!  Today was to be spent putting the room together, accessorizing (cuz ya know how every man's office needs that) and building the two pieces of furniture needed from Ikea.

I turned on the TV to babysit the kids and put up every type of barricade I could to prohibit the entrance of little munchkins to ruin the space I had spent so long painting.  Whilst they were happily singing along with Super Why, I plugged in the vacuum to get rid of all the spackling I had sanded onto the carpet.  The vacuum was plugged.  I ran up the stairs to grab the snake and began the quarterly process of unclogging our central vacuum.  30 minutes later, the floor was free of debris and ready for me to make it all dirty again!  This time, the mess would come from the Ikea purchases (little did I know just how big that mess would be).

The excess cardboard and packing elements were placed near the stairs to be taken up to recycling on my next trip.  I heard Abi laughing and joyfully telling me how much fun she was having with the snowball fight.  At first I just said, "Oh, that's great."  Then a few minutes later I stepped out of my construction mindset and realized it isn't winter and there most definitely isn't snow inside our house!

Carly had pulverized the strips of styrofoam and had encouraged the other 4 kids (it was a tending day for me..I know, worst babysitter EVER) to join in her merry-mess-making.  My basement was covered in "snow."  I took a deep breath and figured, ah, what the heck, the room needs to be vacuumed anyway.

Not five minutes later, Abi yelled out to me, "Mom, Carly pooped on the train table."  I had recently changed her diaper, so I knew that it couldn't possibly be true.  She didn't poop on the table, she wiped her poop on the train table.  I LOST it!  Made Carly come in and help me scrub the whole thing down.  The whole time she kept telling me how sorry she was and crying.  I believed her, but I was still fuming and she knew it.  Once the wiping was done, she went to her room and cried herself to sleep.  Being a mean mom makes me sad.

Back to the Ikea stuff.  There are no words in those instructions.  Pictures.  Normally, I like pictures.  They just weren't working for me today and I had to redo things a couple of times on the "bench" I was trying to put together.  Got to the final part, putting in the drawers, and it didn't work.

I threw a tantrum like my kids taught me, said some naughty words.  Kicked a drawer.  Broke a piece off of the drawer.  Told the kids I needed to cool off.  Leave me alone.  Took a shower to cool down and clear my head.

My dad called, I gave him my sob story and he promised to come to my aid once he was through with work.  Still frustrated, I called an adorable neighbor girl to come over and watch the kids for a while so I could escape somewhere beyond the confines of my own home....Lowe's sounded good to me!

I was only there for a few minutes and had accomplished all I came to do.  So then I did some more browsing at some other favorite shops like Home Again and Tai Pan Imports before I headed home with renewed energy to be a better mom and finish this office for my Toddy.

Shortly after my little get away, my dad came and repaired the damage I had done to the "bench."  He is always there for me.  So glad to be living within the same zip code as my parents.

The kids and I went into the backyard and played for a while.  Dakota fell off of the porch.  Carly fell off of the porch.  I was pulling weeds in the garden and unknowingly stood on a pile of ants who were not happy with me there, so they bit me.  A lot.  Charlotte came over for a playdate that her "mom told her to come to."  Her mom wasn't even home.  I know, I had just visited with her mom.  20 minutes later her sister came over grateful to have found the missing child.  I am just grateful that Charlotte comes to our place and not some strangers.

I do like being outdoors with the kids.  We should get out more often.

We did the whole bedtime regime and I went back downstairs to focus wholeheartedly on the few things that I could complete on the project, but as stated earlier, the blinds I was installing are 1 1/2" too short.  BLAH!!!!  I just threw down the screwdriver, shut off the lights, closed the door and gave up.

The unveiling tomorrow when Todd comes home is going to be rather uneventful.  Perhaps I won't even tell him that I did anything to his office, and maybe he won't use it for 2 weeks, and maybe then I can have the whole room put together and wave my arms all showcasey and razzle-dazzle him then.

Or maybe, he will go downstairs to use his office, walk in, laugh at what he sees, give me a big hug and laugh while saying, "Ahhh, I love you Mel."  Cuz, in all reality, whenever I start a project, bombs like this explode and they never turn out like Candice Olsen's.

Todd has accepted it.  Why haven't I?