I thought that we had moved on from the chaotic irreverent Sunday's but they are back and each one is getting worse.
Why is it impossible for us to make it through a whole sacrament meeting without having to take one, two or all three children out? Am I expecting way to much from my 3, 2 and nearly 1 year old? Duh, I just wrote that out and am now realizing that I am. They are just kids, they are acting like kids. Who wants to sit still for that long at that age?
Connor is obsessed with the rubber snake and the lizard that have been thrown up onto the ceiling of the foyer and I think he purposefully acts out just so he can go and sit on the couch out there and talk about them to anyone that passes by. His amazing discovery, I guess.
Carly is mobile now and is magnetically attracted to the floor and has to be on it at all times crawling. Anytime we put her down on the floor she hits her head on the hymn book holder and then she has to go out, which means Connor follows right behind (without his shoes...he can't stand to wear his shoes anymore...they fit, but he's like his mom, I don't like them either).
Todd is left alone with Abigail. The angel child (did you ever think that those words would be typed in the same sentence as Abi?). She is in this very cuddly kissy stage and likes to just be held. Unless her brother is around...they don't exactly like each other all the time.
As soon as the closing prayer is said I scoop up Abi and quickly rush the kids off to nursery. So excited to be rid of them for a few hours. Sacrament meeting is exhausting to me and I have a hard time listening to the speakers, let alone the spirit. Am I impenetrable now? It must be those horrible thoughts of wanting to leave one adult home with the kids during sacrament meeting and exchanging each week.
Anyway, Todd gets Carly during Sunday School and he gets her to squishily and beautifully fall asleep in his lap (he has the magic touch and can always get her to fall asleep in his arms...what in the world is wrong with my arms?). He heads off to Elders Quorum and I am left with the sleeping angel who has to be passed off to a wonderful sister in the ward to cuddle with while I go and attend to my secretarial duties. I failed at being a secretary today.
I didn't assign anyone for the prayers, I failed to put the "good news" on the agenda and then I called a "hymn" a "song" and got chastised by this sweet woman in the ward...in front of the whole Relief Society because I was playing the piano, which I don't do well. And this same woman asked me to play the second verse of a hymn more slowly and then I had to plunk through "Because I have Been Given Much." I think I have had 10 piano lessons in my whole life and that song has 4 flats!!! AUGH!
So Relief Society ends and I gather all the children. Abigail's diaper is literally dripping because it is so full of fluids and Connor is so naughty. I can't wait to get home. I find Todd and he tells me that we all need to go to the Stake President's office so he can be set apart as the new Elder's Quorum President. While trying to regather my missing children, I tumble over a sweet little nursery girl, skinning my knee and certainly giving little Hailey nightmares of a large woman falling on her for the rest of her life.
When we arrive at the Stake President's Office, Connor kicks off his shoe and starts bouncing along the tops of the chairs. I almost came unglued. Abi sat on one of the chairs leaving a massive wet spot. I couldn't keep the kids contained. I finally used physical force and held Connor on my lap. He started hitting me, so I whispered "please don't hit" because one of the blessings what taking place. At which point he yells "mom...stop hitting me." I had never raised a hand or my voice to this rotten child.
I was so anxious to get home and put all of my children to bed. Even the good ones. They are all now quietly sleeping in their beds.
What do you do to help keep your kids quiet/reverent and sitting in the pew for the whole sacrament meeting? HELP!!!!!
Oh boy...do I need to get help? Am I fit to be a mother/wife of an EQP or in the RS presidency?